Feeling everything... all at once!

What is normal?

Feelings and emotions are running high! Not sure what I am "suppose to" feel. I am all over the place; from feeling pride exploding from my chest to sadness burning my eyes for hours... it is very confusing...and stressful.... and exciting.... and I could go on and on.

My daughter is off to college. Leaving her there and coming home alone felt like someone cutting my arm off, leaving a piece of my heart there, unable to breathe, smiling and crying at the same time, proud, hopeful, despair, lonely, anxious, happy -- literally everything ALL AT ONCE.

We are incredibly close, she is my best friend. We are/were co-dependent. Now, we are apart.

I knew it would be a lot harder on my end than hers. She is so busy with a new environment, new roommate, classes, parties, friends, activities... I am home, avoiding her vacant room, the unused garage bay, crying in the car going to get coffee - alone.

When she calls, I listen to the excitement in her voice for all things new. I feel excited for her and all that is to come, all her new experiences. I smile while she talks. I try to keep conversation light because I know if I tell her how much I miss her, she will feel sad. So, I just keep listening until she needs to go. I quickly say "I miss you and love you very much. Talk to you later." We hang up. I cry.

I find myself being envious of other moms who seem to be "fine". Their FB posts are smiles and happy tears. They only express pride, and maybe a few light words about missing their child. Are they sad and just putting on a brave face? Do they cry when they're alone? Or is it all smiles and encouragement and acceptance?

There is no instruction manual that says how we should feel and how we should cope. Are my feelings normal or am I being overly emotional?